I have been away from my site for a long long time now. I have not had any motivation to write anymore as a matter of fact. Why? I don't know it myself. I have been too busy with my life. If you don't know how busy I am, ask Mabel, or Carolyn. They're the ones who see me everyday. For your information, I've finished six papers. Now just getting my project started. Shall I say this is an achievement so far, for finishing six papers, with just a project to be finished? No, I should say, even though six papers seem like a lot of work, the road ahead is still long. I think it will be a long long 4 months for me. For the past 2 weeks I have been sitting in front of computer analysing the data my sponsor sent me, and trying to develop a proposal. It may seem like just another assignment for me, but this size is huge! I have never imagined the amount of work required for the completion of the proposal, not to mention the whole project, could be this massive. Just when i thought six papers have been considered enough for me to get this degree, the time and energy this project requires can suffocate me to death! I just got an email from my supervisor, telling me that more work will be needed for me to pass it, and guess how long that i should be working on this project? an impossible 50+ to 60 hours a week! if i were to breakdown the hours into working days, I would be looking at 12 hours a day. yeah, it's hell. and the sad thing is: I'm not getting paid. zero wage, for 12 hour work. let's do a bit of math here: 12 work a day, minus 8 hrs sleep, i only have 4 hrs left, for eating, cooking, or just not doing work and sleep! how sad can this life be, when you're not getting paid and you have to pay for food from your own pocket money (yeah, i'm still a student, using every penny of my parents').Come to think of these past few months, I have been looking around for projects, seeking people from the industry, calling up, emailing, meeting people at doorstep without prior arrangements (as you know that people do not want to waste their time on you, as a student). With all the humiliation, time and effort wasting, you hope that it would come out good in the end. yeah, with all the hard work in search of a fruitful result, I got one. Unpaid. Right. I am pretty tired and sick of all these bullshits of this whole year, even though I am thankful for the teachings of some really good lecturers and some pretty good practical lessons. But hey, I would love to improve this. As one of the members of this batch, I would like to contribute. That day will come somehow, I tell myself. Constantly.Yes, sitting here typing all these wouldn't help much either. But here I am again, you may think that i'm bullshitting but I do believe some people may still be reading this blog of mine. And I'd like to tell you. YOu're the bomb. You have been the motivation for me to keep on blogging, even though there are no more good photos or funny stuff to look at, but truth is here. It's a Friday night. I need a little break. I need to relax. Why? I have 4 more major assignments to go. For the past 4 weeks, I have been calling up companies, offering to do a free quality assessment for them. Is it so hard to just spend an hour for a student like me? Well, I've mentioned, "anytime at your convenience", didn't i? Why being so hard when you have had experienced it yourself before as a young student? The road ahead is not smooth, you need to be strong and bold.Life without a doubt is mysterious. One day you're happy, another day you're sad. I have been experiencing this quite frequently these days. You hope that people around you will understand you every minute of your life, but it ain't that easy. I'm saying this because misunderstandings, conflicts have been so often happening that I seem to have to give way to something else apart from my own life. I don't want to be lost. I am still myself. Please respect my life.
Attached photo of today's blog: Everyone's got pressure in their life, so is the life of a grid girl... =)
Currently listening to Dei Hamo - We Gon Ride